Can I get a "holler" please?

We three are living large. Highschool sweethearts. Married in the Newport Beach LDS Temple. Two kids. Taking life a day at a time!

Monday, January 13, 2020

The long awaited post! She's already 1 week old!!!!

Well, first of all, I have to say...we've brought an absolute ANGEL into this world. I have never come across a more well behaved, good natured, happy, intelligent little baby. I asked my parents if they think we're biased...they said that everyone feels this way about their children. I just can't believe she doesn't cry for no reason at all. I have no better way to describe her, than she's an angel. She knows her mama and dad, she loves making eye contact with everyone who holds her, she's VERY alert, started holding her own head up at birth (I was simply amazed!), and there's so much more. That will all come in time. First comes first, the labor story. Be forwarned...if you don't like knowing personal things about other people, don't read my blog. I'm not one to sugar coat or substitute words for the comfort of others. :) Before I go into the labor experience, I'm going to start with a little bit of necessary information from an appointment I had two days prior. Twice a week I was going in for fetal monitoring, and at my appointment on thursday, Sept 3, my nurse decided it was time to get me scheduled for induction (based of my increasing blood pressure and continued elevated heart rate, which on that day my bp was around 140/95 (I THINK), and my heart rate was staying at 140ish. During the appt, both only dropped by about 4 points. After an hour of rest, normal women would have stabilized. Anyway, my nurse called a doctor who "respects her opinion" and as I left the appt, I was scheduled for a midnight induction on Sunday at 12am. The nurse told this OB about my situation, and the OB agreed to induce me based on that info, which included how dilated/effaced I was. This nurse was the one who check my progress and stripped my membranes the week prior. She decided I was 2cm and 805 effaced. Ok, now on with labor and delivery!

Saturday came and went like any other day. I got my house absolutely spic and span, we got her stuff 100% ready, and we had the car packed and ready to go. Last minute, we even decided to invest in cord blood banking, so at 11 at night we were calling cord blood registries trying to get our hands on a kit. Kaiser doesn't carry them, they require their patients to bring them with them. Tight wads.

At 11:50 Saturday night, we left for Kaiser. Upon our arrival, they took us up to our room and got us situated. A couple hours later, after 2 very VERY painful exams, the midwife and doctor both decided that I wasn't 2cm or 80% effaced, but that instead, I was 1 cm and "thick" (not effaced at all). The doctor on duty at the time (Dr. Arora) was confused as to why I'd be admitted for an induction if I hadn't made more progress initially. She asked me if Dr. Doan (the Dr who approved my induction, who was scheduled to arrive at 8am and planned to deliver me) had given me my exam. I told her I'd never even met Dr. Doan, that I was scheduled for an iduction based on what the nurse discovered in my pelvic exam, and per her suggestion. Dr. Arora was very surprised that I'd be admitted for an induction based merely on the opinion of a nurse, without a Doctor ever signing off on it or seeing me themself. I agreed. However, I didn't realize what a huge difference progress makes, prior to getting to the hospital. Apparently, when your cervix is still thick, if they start you on pitocin with no effacement, the contractions will begin and they'll push baby into a brick wall, basically. Where as if I was already effaced, the contractions would push baby right through a soft cervix, and I could continue to dilate. All that said, Dr. Arora gave us a choice. It was almost 2 AM by this time. She told us that before starting us on pitocin, she would need to insert a pill that softens the cervix, and hope that it helps me dilate. She said she was allowed to try a max of 2 pills, each taking 4 hours on its own to do what it can. She told us that for some women, the pill is extremely painful, and others can't feel a thing. She also said that for some women it doesn't work at all, and for others it works like a dream. She did, however, inform us that the risk of having to have a c-section is 1 in 2, instead if the normal 1 in 3 odds with just inducing using pitocin. But, the only way they could move forward with the induction was if they softened my cervix first. After MUCH consideration and MANY questions, we (Neal, Me, Mom) decided it would be best to move forward with the pill. Worst case scenario, the pill doesn't work to soften my cervix, and I'd still be allowed to stop and go home. The only thing that would keep me from going home is if my water broke, or if they started the pitocin. All that said, we started the pill around 2:30. I slept for 4 hours, they woke me, checked me, and I had dilated 2 more cm (to a 3) and had become 50% effaced. This was great news! My body was responding beautifully, AND I wasn't feeling pain. So they put the second pill in, I slept a few more hours, they came back and checked me, and I had dilated another cm. So by a little before 11am sunday morning, I was at 4cm and 80% effaced. So, at noon, they started the pitocin! We were sooooooo happy to start that next phase.

They started the pitocin, and my body didn't really feel much for an hour or two, I think. I can't quite remember that part. When I got my epidural, I didn't get it because the contractions were too painful...I got it because my Doctor (Dr Arora had gone home and Dr. Doan had arrived) was a total jerk and liked hurting me as much as possible with every exam. The epidural itself wasn't painful like I thought it would be. But, the position I was in made me very uncomfortable and achy, and very hot. That was difficult. After the epidural, they gave me a catheter, and began pumpin up the pitocin every half hour. About an hour after getting the epi, I started really feeling some contractions. I looked at the screen - the contractions were big, and I was feeling them. I had Neal grab the nurse. This is the best part - the anesthesiologist never started the epidural pump! She had only manually injected the meds into the epidural iv, but had forgotten to begin the pump. So, I was feeling contractions! To be totally honest, as mad as I was that I'd gone through the discomfort of an epidural and was feeling the contractions anyway, there was a part of me that was happy I was feeling what they were like. This way, I can know for next time, and can make a better educated decision on what path I take for my labor and delivery. That said, contractions are nothing like I thought they'd be. They're just like Braxton Hicks, with pain that feels like you have to take a gnarly watery poo...but it's not as bad as diarhea cramps, either. I will say, as they increased in their intensity, the volume of my groans increased, too. But, I didn't want to die!! That was huge for me. :) So anyway, my nurse came in and turned on my epi pump...and within an hour, I was reeeeeaaally feeling numb. With the original amount of meds the anesthesiologist pumped in me, I could still basically move my legs. Couldn't feel them completely, but they weren't so heavy I couldn't move them. With as often as my nurse had set the meds to pump in me, I was so full of meds, that eventually I couldn't even wiggle my toes. She had told me that I should be able to wiggle them. So we called her back in to turn the epi down a notch. About 20 minutes later, I was feeling some very very strong contractions, back to back. We called the nurse back in, and she told us that she'd decided to turn my epidural off instead of turning it down. Excuse me, and excuse my language, but who the hell does she think she is???? So, needless to say, she turned it back on, but for the SECOND time I was feeling contractions, very strong ones, and I'd endured the discomfort of an epidural specifically to avoid uneccessary pain. Once was enough for me. So, after several hours on pitocin (maybe like 6), we started wondering why no one had checked me to see how dilated I was. The nurse was happy to come in every 30 minutes and crank up my pitocin until it was maxed out, but she never checked me to see if that was even necessary. Around 9ish, the baby's heart rate started to decelerate. I wasn't scared at first. But then, a bunch of nurses started coming into the room, cramming oxygen in my face and doing other things to help my nurse. They paged Dr. Doan. She came in and put an internal fetal monitor on the baby to better track her heart rate. It was definitely going down and down, and very quickly. Dr. Doan asked how dilated I was - surprise surprise, no one knew. She checked me quickly, I was 8cm and 100% thinned out. We all watched the heart monitor, everyone ready to act, everyone scared to death, everyone silent. We watched as the monitor showed Mckenzi's heart rate drop by one point every beat, until we lost it completely. Silent tears streaked my face quite heavily, as I began praying and pleading with Heavenly Father to watch over my little one while the Doctors and nursing staff did what they could to help her. I was scared to death. They all started shouting demands and yelling things I didn't understand, as I continued to cry and nod my head in agreement at things they were yelling at me in an attempt to "comfort" me in the situation. As they raced me on my bed to the OR for an emergency c-section, I passed my mom, I passed Neal, and all I saw on their faces was fear and confusion. This had all happened in a matter of seriously only 1 minute. We were happy and fine one moment, and the next, all was chaos.

They rushed me through door after door, banging into walls and crashing into things, and wheeled me into a room that's just like the ones you see on tv. There were about 15 bodies in the room with me. The shouting continued, the panicked voices were yelling over eachother and everyone was scrambling to do their part to save my little one's life. My fear was so overwhelming at this time, I was so incredibly scared for Mckenzi, that all I can do is sit here now and cry as I relive the moment. If for some reason it was in Heavenly Father's plan to take our little lovely away from this life just as we were about to have her in our arms to love and to cherish, I wasn't sure how I would recover from that. More than anything, my biggest thought was how I didn't want Mckenzi feeling any pain or experiencing any trama. Was it my fault for going ahead with the induction? Could I have prevented this? Had I gone against God's plan for her delivery, and so this was happening? I wasn't sure. Whatever the case was, I was dreadfully afraid of the outcome for our baby. As I lay on the bed, with people poking me and prodding me, scrubbing me and yelling at me, yelling at eachother, I just looked up and cried. And prayed. And prayed. And prayed. A new anesthesiologist had been trying to fill my epidural iv with an abundance of medication. Even though they had the c-section curtain lined up in front of me, I could still see everything that the Doctors were doing - the giant circular light over our heads was like a ridiculously large mirror. I closed my eyes tight. I felt pinching on my thighs as a Doctor yelled out, "can you feel this?"...and I knew (from having seen before I closed my eyes) that a scalpal was already on my belly waiting for the go ahead from the anesthesiologist. As I told them I felt every pinch, they swore and told the anesthesiologist that she needed to put me under and she needed to put me under 30 seconds ago. All I could think was, "If they need to cut me open and I have to feel it, or if they have to kill me to help her live, DO IT. Just DO IT. HELP HER." Next thing I know, my nurse has a mask crammed on my face, tells me to take a big breath, I obey, and I choke. The smell was so strong, stronger than any gas mask I'd ever experienced, and it was blowing so hard, I panicked and thrashed my face away. How was this going to work? It was suffocating me. The nurse yelled right in my face, both forcefully and gently - "Wendy! You have to do this for your baby! I know it feels like you're choking and that you can't breathe, but you have to let us suffocate you with this gas so that your baby will have a chance of surviving." That's all she needed to say. I nodded, and voluntarily suffocated. I still remember that pain. Luckily the suffocating was swift enough that I didn't feel it for long.

I woke up in a large recovery room. I was so doped up, it was all I could do to keep my eyes open. I had to ask questions. The first obvious one, "Is she okay?". A voice nearby said, "Yes, your daughter is fine. She's in the NICU right now, she'll be there for a few hours, but her Daddy is with her." Relief. Absolute relief. Tears. Pain. More tears. My baby was okay. She was here. We were both okay. I asked question after quesetion...how much does she weight? How long is she? What color hair does she have? No one knew the answers. I was in and out of consciousness, but never let myself stay asleep for more than 30 seconds. My nurse came in and held up 2 pictures in front of my face - it was my daughter, eyes wide open, lots of brown hair, alert and lovely in absolutely every way. She put the pictures on my chest, and returned to be with my baby. My baby that was practically perfect in every way. A NICU nurse came into the room and began telling me a little more information. Mckenzi had come out a little grey, and was having some minor breathing problems, but she was stable and all looked promising. She told me I would see her in a few hours, when she'd be brought to my room and would be all mine from then on out. I tried asking her all the same questions about Mckenzi (in my drunken stupor) and she couldn't tell me a thing, either. Why didn't anyone know how much my dang baby weighed??? Sheesh! Then my husband came in the room. He looked so worn, like something had almost beat him to a bloody pulp, but at the same time, he had an undeniable look of both joy and relief freshly plastered all over his face. He took my hand, talked about Mckenzi, and then I found out all the questions no one knew. I asked him who was with Kenzi, and he said no one. I looked at him and told him to go be with her, and he said he would stay with me. So then I said, "I went through hell to bring our beautiful daughter into this world, now go be with her." I knew he was so happy I said that, I knew he wanted to be with her more than anything, once he knew I was okay. And so he went. Nurses came in and out every 15 minutes to examine me - the pressed hard on my stomach to make sure I wasn't bleeding internally and that everything was progressing as it should. All was well.

I was wheeled into my room around midnight. I had been rushed in for my csection at 9:38pm, and 8 minutes later at 9:46pm, Kenzi was delivered. Neal said I was in surgery for 45 minutes. She weighed 7 LB 6 OZ, 21 inches long. Long fingers, longs toes, slanted eyes, long skinny chicken legs and arms...all like her Daddy. JUST like her Daddy. Lots of brown hair, and LOOKS just like mommy. I'll post my baby picture and hers on here so you can see just how much we look alike. It's unbelievable! She's very mellow, very alert, opens her eyes wide every time she's held so she can see exactly who's holding her. She's very sweet, and she knows exactly who her mommy and daddy are. Nothing soothes her better than being in her parents arms. When one parent doesn't work, the other one will absolutely work. She has zero problems breastfeeding. She latched on with ease the very first time. She loves being swaddled, doesn't mind when she's not, she enjoys being gently kissed all over her face...for some reason, it's very soothing and familiar to her. She lost almost a pound in the hospital, and has been gaining it back every day. My milk came in 2 days ago, and she's gained 6 oz in those 2 days! She's almost back to her birth weight. Still, she's so tiny she doesn't fit into any of her newborn clothes. She's long and skinny, and I think she gets her weight from her length. The only clothes that come close to fitting are premie clothes! She takes a bottle with no problem at all, will suck on a binky if we want her to, and so far enjoys her baths...as long as the temperature is right!

We love our little bundle. Couldn't be happier as parents. We knew we'd love her...but we never could have fathomed how much we'd LIKE her, too. She's my bestfriend, she's Neal's new little love, and we're the happiest family we could be. We're simply in love, and in awe, of the gift we've been entrusted with. She's such a blessing. Mckenzi has made us better people by merely existing. I cry just about every day when I think about how she'll grow up, and how I don't want her to. I am doing my best to savor every moment with her. It's not difficult.

Here are just a few pictures. Because I have so many pictures to post, I'm going to post her most of her hospital pics on Facebook. If any of you don't have access, let me know, and I'll tell you how to access them. Pictures from here on out will be blogged as well as posted on FB. But, it would take way too long to post labor and delivery pics on blogger. So facebook it is!










Sunday, December 1, 2019

Friday, April 26, 2013

Weight Loss

Hey. I don't really blog here right now, because I'm just too dang busy blogging over on my weight loss blog, working on all my shoots (which are actually updated more frequently on my Facebook page, not so often on my website), and plain old being a mom. I'm richly blessed. My kids are growing like weeds, we've moved to a new county, and life is breezing by. I can't believe how fast it all goes.

Word to the wise: Don't go to my blog if you don't want to see my chubby bare skin. And certainly don't go to my blog if you plan to offer any sort of negativity or criticism. This is not an invitation to be a lame human being ;)

Peace out friends!

Friday, October 12, 2012

Back and forth

Hey ya'll. So it's time for me to start blogging again. Why? Well, mostly because it's something I can do to keep my hands and mind busy at the same time, while also enjoying myself. I am sooooooo ridiculously tired of being fat. I mean, like, it's crippling. I know it's in my head to a certain degree, but come on folks, the scale don't lie. My weight has alllllways been a struggle (not necessarily a struggle with obesity, just a struggle with NEVER being thin enough. Battle of the bulge, so to speak) and I want there to be a time in my life (before I die) where I am not consumed by whether or not people can tell just how big my fat roll is. You hear me?

I've gone back and forth about whether or not to blog on a separate weight loss blog, but I don't think I'll do that. Considering the fact that my problems with weight are pretty all consuming right now, it's a big part of my life. So as I blog, I'll blog about my successes and failures with my weight loss journey, and I'll begin blogging about our lives, too. Cuz I definitely have not done that. And Diesel is already 13 months! Time sure flies these days. I feel like I blinked and the last year went away.

So lets see. Lemme give some kid updates. I'll start with Mckenzi.

Mckenzi Mae:
-Turned 3 last month
- Potty trained herself in May, and fully night potty trained herself the day we moved into our new place (right when she turned 3). And when I say potty trained herself, it's zero exaggeration. I started trying to train her a little before she was two, and would try here and there every couple of months. She knew what the toilet was. She knew what to do. She just was totally disinterested. Then one day she said she had to pee, she went to the bathroom, did her thing (while I watched from the doorway without her knowing) and we never looked back! It was the easiest transition ever. Every time she peed, it was a major party. Every time she pooped, we celebrated as though she won an emmy. Truth be told, she still likes us to party in her honor, and we do appease her now and again. When she suddenly stopped peeing in her night time pull up, I was simply astonished. I figured it would be a while til we could night train her, because she takes around 6 ounces of milk every night before bed. Everyone says to stop doing fluids a couple of hours before bed when you're night time training, and my husband just wasn't on board with taking the milk-comfort routine away from her yet. Mckenzi has always been difficult to sleep train, so when we found a schedule that she jived with, we were hesitant to consider any sort of change. So when she stopped wetting her pull up at night while still having her bed time milk, we were (needless to say) stoked beyond reason. The girl is a champ.
-The girl is super theatrical in alllll things. LOVES to dance, LOVES to sing, enjoys choreography, attentions, talking, jibbering nothing at all (thinking she's being super intelligent), etc etc.
-Huge personality. The girl is so friendly and fearless that it not only scares me sometimes, but it's also totally embarassing on ocassion. For instance, at disneyland yesterday while in line for Pirates, Mckenzi began to share our life story with the old couple behind us. By the time we got on the boats, they knew all of our names, that grandma is her bestfriend, daddy is a police man, all the rides we rode so far that day, that twix (our dog) poops all over our rear driveway, that she hurt her butt when she fell off the chair the day before, and so on and so forth. Joy, right? We will be working on boundaries and appropriate conversation starters, obviously. I am glad she's not super shy and afraid of everyone, but I do need to start educating her about strangers and the like.
- Speaks spanish. It surprised us. Dora has taught the girl to count to ten in enspanol!
- Counts to around 20ish, and not because of us. I don't care what people say. TV is awesomely educational. She has known how to count like this for at least a year, if not more. Same with her abc's.
-The girl can sing. She carries a tune and has such a sweet little voice. Sing her a song a couple of times, and she knows it by heart start to finish. She can be found roaming disneyland, singing twinkle twinkle little start at the top of her lungs. She makes sure she sings it loud enough so that everyone she walks by looks at her and makes eye contact. The girl lives for that, I swear. She won't be held back, either. Tell her to sing a little quieter, and she shouts like a maniac.
-Her current pop song requests are "Call Me Maybe" by Carly Rae Jepson and "Marry You" by Bruno Mars. She knows the songs word for word, and one of her favorite things to do is bump it with her head phones on to these songs on repeat while we ride in the car. I dont' know whether to shake my head or laugh out loud as my 3 year old belts out these lyrics. Bad mom? Who knows. My kid is having a blast.
- She is a talking maniac. NON STOP. You will certainly become quickly annoyed with the lack of silence around Mckenzi (if you're not already used to it). It's difficult for new people that aren't used to being around us. I forget sometimes that she's considered a talker because it's just part of my life. I love my little talker though. Not to say I don't appreciate some silence for a couple hours once a week!
-Disneyland is currently all the rage for Mckenzi. Nothing is too fast, too high, or too scary. She's crazy and a total fanatic like her dad. Now he has a riding buddy! He can't wait til she's a couple of inches taller (neither can she, frankly. she's dieing to ride splash mountain) so that she can ride everything with him. Gotta be 40 inches for most of the big stuff, except for Indiana which is 46 inches i think.

That's enough about her. Now for D-man.

Diesel Scott
-When reprimanding Diesel, I rarely use his middle name. It's the "normal" thing to do, I can just never think of it, and when I finally do remember what the heck the kid's middle name it, it doesn't feel right using it because it's my dad's name. It's weird. Boo. I've tried calling him by his first and last name, but it just doesn't work! I need a good discipline name for him, lol!
-He doesn't talk nearly as much as Mckenzi did (and does). He's our little observer. He watches.
-He's not reserved and he's not shy, he doesn't let Mckenzi (or others) boss him around and he doesn't slip behind the scenes. He's a powerful yet quiet presence, and I love to watch his little personality develop.
-He knows what he wants, and he's not afraid to let himself be heard. Don't let his usually quiet demeanor fool you! Kid can squak with the best of um!
-He's very strong willed. If he wants to do something, he'll do his best to get exactly what he wants, but he does it as quietly as possible. Mckenzi is the opposite; she is loud and proud and lets you know that her plan is to be defiant and that's just how it's gonna be, kicking and screaming and all. Diesel will avoid eye contact and go straight for the prize, as you tell him 'no', and that's that. He'll get it one way or another, and then when he is reprimanded afterwards, has the most heartbreaking, sincere little sad face/cry you'll ever see or hear in your life. Kid knows exactly what he's doing! Love him.
-He is all boy. He loves balls. Will sit still with his jaw dropped, mouth open, eyes wide as he watches his uncle play around with a basketball. Then once he has watched for long enough, he'll simply point and beg to play too. He's got very big hands, and does well both throwing and catching and playing with balls easily enough that he rarely gets frustrated. It's so cute. He'll definitely be an athlete. Nothing else captures his interest quite like his Uncle Jared and basketballs. Though, he does love his sister's chapsticks. It's her current obsession, and because she's so obsessed, obviously he is too.
- He doesn't say many words. Dadda, Momma, and that's about it. We think he might be trying to articulate other words like "uh oh" etc, but it's too inconsistent to tell. He blabbers on and on and it's the cutest little language, he just hasn't shown interest in actually speaking much.
- He does use sign language as a way to communicate, and it's so cute. Usually it's just to express that he wants "more".
-He's so happy and fun and excited, and he's such a joy that it's ridiculous. He has opened our eyes to why people have so many kids. If all kids are like Diesel, we would have 6 too! Mckenzi is like having 4 kids, I'm not even joking.
-He's a sleep champ (not unlike his mother ;P). He takes a 2-4 hour nap every day, and then goes to bed at 6:30/7 and wakes up between 7/9am. Champ, right? And he just puts himself to sleep, and that's how he wants it. I did not have to sleep train him, it's just always how he's preferred to do it. Lay him in his bed with his bottle and his silky, and that's that. He doesn't cry, he just rolls to the side, closes his eyes, and sleeps. I'm totally fist shaking at all you ladies that swear up and down that Mckenzi is a bad sleeper because of me. You can suck it. It's how she came. She doesn't like sleep. Or at least she hadn't realized until recently that sleep and rest is nice, and now she understands and embraces that sleep feels good and she needs it. I never changed enforcing her schedule/routine etc, she merely began to realize that sleep is good, and that she's not really missing out on life while she sleeps. The girl has such a ridiculous zest for life that sleep was always such a disappointment for her. Anyway, Diesel is not the same. I've trained him and taught him just exactly the same as I did with Mckenzi. He did not want to co-sleep; Mckenzi thrived on co-sleeping. I nursed them both almost exactly the same amount of time (Diesel a year, kenzi 13 months). I'm the same mom to both of them, and their personalities are just so different, that their habits are different. And that's all there is to it!
-Diesel is a dancing kind like his sister. He drops it like it's hot, fist pumps, and head bobs like it's nobodies bizniz. I have the best video of it, too. No one introduced him to dancing like we did Mckenzi. He started on his own, and hasn't stopped since. If he hears music, his fist is in the air and he's booty shaking for miles. LOVE IT.

OK, that's enough of an update for now. In other news, Neal is officially hired with his new department. We still don't know when he'll start with them, but that's ok. At least we know we're in. We seriously can't wait for the transfer. We are happy with the change, and don't think that it can come soon enough. Also, I'm 60 pounds overweight and considered obese by 2 pounds. Hooray. Check back for updates there, cuz it's all down hill from here. I worked my ass off for 2 months straight and lost major inches, barely any pounds, and then took a month off and I think I undid everything I worked so hard for, hahaha. Oh, life. Life, life, life. But I'm ok. I'm not done with my journey. I'm bound and determined to lose the weight, because I made a deal with myself that I wouldn't have another baby until it's a reasonable and healthy thing to do. Right now, I am not healthy enough. Gimme 6 months, we'll talk then.

Tuesday, September 11, 2012

Thompsons

Can u think of anyone else?

Thompsons
Fonsecas
Stevens
Rychliks
Solesbees x 2
Browns
Employees
Potters
Scb clients
Ward
Coopers
Gillespies
Sims
Garcias
Li Nkous
Casella
Spadafore




Thanks, Jacque Brown

Saturday, August 18, 2012

Blogging is time consuming!

I have become a non-blogging nightmare! I remember back in like 2007 when I would seriously blog up to 4 times a day. Can we say obsessed? Certainly. But let's be real. I was married, I'd graduated from my program and wasn't even working much (let's face it. I liked being a stay-at-home-wife hahaha), and I had all the time in the world. So I blogged about every single significant feeling and every single insignificant feeling. Lol. I apologize on behalf of my younger self. And today, I apologize for my total lack of bloggotry too.

Let's be real. I'm busy working on a total body/mind transformation. I've been a fat mess (yes, I'm talking literally and not) for ohhhhhhh 3.75 years now. It pretty much started when I got pregnant with Mckenzi, and I
just never bounced back. After Mckenzi, I was so overwhelmed by her GIANT and ever-so-high-maintainance personality that it was all I could do to take care of her and maintain any sanity at the same time. I finally got to the point where I could focus on getting healthy, taking care of the house and husband, going to church more regularly, etc right around when I stopped nursing Kenzi (she was 13 months). I hit it hard and lost some good weight, started having some great milestones, and then BAM when Kenzi was 15 months old i got knocked up with kid 2. Insert 9 months of laziness, 50-60lb of weight gain, and one cute little man later, and you have me at the end of that pregnancy. My one goal with Diesel was to not way more than Neal. Alleluia, I never passed him on the scale! Sure came close though. I swear that during 35 hours of labor/pitocin/iv drip/epidural I got so full of fluids and swelled up so bad I probably weighed the same as a really fat man, but let's just be grateful that they don't weigh you when you're in labor. :)

Fast forward to a month or so after Diesel, and I was back to "normal." Normal being the weight I was gonna be after all the fluids and baby gunk made its exit, etc. I weighed about 5-8 lb more than I did after having Mckenzi.

So that was almost a year ago. For the last year I've yo-yo'd up and down every couple of weeks. Committed, not committed. You name it. Ive stayed
within that same 5-8lb. Ridiculous.

So for some reason, 6 weeks ago it happened. It finally clicked. I committed, and I'm STILL committed. And we are talking AWESOMELY committed. Change of diet (major), and I work out like a maniac. Like, for realsies work out. Not go to the gym and walk on a treadmill while I watch reality tv on my iPhone (ok so I still do that sometimes). We are talking high intensity interval training. I try and maintain a regimen of 1 hour a day minimum. I think I'm doing awesome. The hard part of doing it this way is that I'm building muscle as quickly as I'm losing fat, so the scale hasn't shifted nearly as much as it would have in the past if I'd merely just changed my diet and walked here and there. But, in 6 weeks I've lost over 21 inches, I fit in my clothes and it doesn't look like I'm trying to squeeze into my little sisters wardrobe, and that's what matters. I'm on my way! And I'm not giving up. There's like no question about it.

I take progress photos every Saturday in my sports bra and underwear, and I'm so glad I've been good about that. I still have a ways to go before I'm happy with how I look nekkid, but heck. The change is inspiring me. If you'd like to see my nasty chubby girl pics, I'm happy to update u via private text. If I know you and we are tight. Otherwise, just don't even bother asking. That would just be creepy and weird.

So that's me! I can't wait to post my before and after pics on here next summer after a year. I imagine by then I will certainly have reached my goal. What's my goal? Healthy! Not chubby! That should technically put me anywhere from being 30-60 pounds lighter, depending on how hardcore I decide to go with the muscle building.

Ok! There's a blog for you!

Monday, July 2, 2012